My Blog

Three separate encouragements I received along this tough two months from my boss,my guys and one of my close "buddy" in facilitation had really help me to say that I had done well even though the circumstances were a bit tough. I understand the need to acknowledge my own efforts and these external views are giving me an extra boost in substaining my spirit in the respective areas of my life. Looking further, I still have a mindset that there are so many things I could have done better, shouldn’t have screwed up here,there and everywhere.Perhaps my version of striving for the best in life is not commonly used, but it’s effective in my context. I’m never satisfied in my comedy of errors and just enjoy picking on myself to push myself to improve.  (not to mention bringing my own morale down at the same time)

Nevertheless, I’m still thankful that people affirm my capabilities and efforts that I had done so far. The balance of ext good comments and own style of picking on myself will certainly put me  in good stead in days to come. For now, I will still try to lick my wounds by sleeping after a brusied encouter at the assessment today.

Underwent the Singapore version of going through the Facilitation assessment process today. Felt so humbled by the experience as there just so many more things to learn. I have been "fortunate" so far and the mock up group I got was just so challenging. One doing his own stuff, one playing with his handphone, two trying to have mini conversations. Yes, I certainly felt I was at level zero all over again. Really have to do some more soul-searching, re-look,reflect and re-write my own style.

Guess it’s not so easy to get certified after all by the international body. Have to try harder and work towards the CPF dream…

Finally after a month of busy and tight schedules, I had managed to stay at home for sat and sun, laze around and take a breather. Almost went crazy after back to back issues coming my way. Conducted my first facilitation workshop and realised organising and doing pure facilitation are two different things. Went back to office and faced another problem. Felt so frustrated that I had written to my boss to let off my chest. Yup, was certainly on high tension for quite a while now. If my gf never stand by me, I really don’t know what will happen. Looking ahead, I have a few more big things in line for the next month. Exams are round the corner and my CoC assessment as a compentent local facilitator is just a week away. So nervous about it. People went for international certitification and passed, mine just a small one compared to theirs. However, to me, every test I take is a big one.May I pass all the tests and exams. Then I will focus on my merging plans execution. Got so tired of where I’m going after it, I decided just to let things run their natural way. Till I’m posted there, I will work like I’m staying. The break has been good and I will tackle one  big test at a time in life. May I pass all my major tests and good things come my way. Ho ho ho…

These few months saw a lot of stress due to happenings at work, school and even home. It came to a stage where I was looking for solace but no one was in sight. I remembered how much I missed one of the two important women in my life and wrote an email to her, pouring out all my sorrows to her. I think she is the only one who can accept me for what I am and who I am.This short incident also made me realised how much she meant to me. Of course, she, being frequently away saw me thinking of her constantly more than other. Thus,I have come to a conclusion that there can only be one gal in my life and she’s the one. Though I’m basically quite a boring person, hope I can spice up her life in some ways and walk this life’s journey together with her. While you are reading this,dear, please bear with me if I’m silly, aloof and even at times boring(definely changing myself to something I’m not is out of the question). I will make up with my sometimes laughable jokes, walking by your side with you,weathering any storms together. May things work out for us in the end.